Honoring Loss in Our Organizations
This fall has been a particularly difficult one for my extended family, culminating in the loss of a beloved aunt and legendary grandfather within just the past two weeks. These losses are each hard in their own way – uniquely shaped to each person who left us and to each person who experiences them.
Loss is an essential part of the human experience, a fact many of us have felt acutely during these last couple of years. These losses are all different – some big, some small, some sharp, some nebulous, and many in every shape and size in between.
But loss isn’t only a personal phenomenon - it’s a professional one, too.
In our mission-driven sectors, loss can look like losing a passionately engaged community member to the disease we are focused on eradicating, sunsetting a program that has touched many lives, losing a grant that has provided critical operational funding, or a favored coworker moving on to a future endeavor.
Loss can also look like revising a long-held mission for more relevance, adopting a new strategic plan or approach that represents a departure from our previous areas of focus, a venerable founder leaving to make room for a new leader, or a merger that will strengthen programs, funding, and advocacy.
Even when loss is brought about by positive circumstances or with the future success of the organization in mind, it creates a disconnect and can lead to grief – so it’s important that we honor it. Without acknowledging and honoring the loss, we prevent ourselves from creating the culture and space needed to welcome what comes next.
If your organization is experiencing change, loss or growth, here are some ideas for honoring the past and preparing for the future:
Write Your “Up 'til Now” Memoir – if your organization is preparing to pivot toward a new path, you can welcome staff, board members, volunteers, and the people you serve to share favorite memories and create a rich personal history of the organization. This can include the usual things – like key dates, important milestones, and accomplishments – but it also should include the personal stories and experiences that have made the organization and its work so important to the people you serve and the people who power it. Use a format like Google Slides, a cloud-based PowerPoint file, or your favorite online whiteboarding tool to capture and share photos, brief stories, quotes, and more.
Create a Memory Wall – if a founder or especially dedicated board member is moving on from the organization, invite folks to share a brief memory of how the organization advanced during their time. This wall can be physical (sticky notes or note cards pasted up on the wall) or digital (using a tool like kudoboard) – the most important thing is that it gives staff, volunteers, and even key partners the chance to honor the legacy of this critical leader in a way that feels authentic and meaningful to them. Being able to share respect and appreciation can help the team feel ready to move forward after that leader has moved on.
Honor & Wish Exercise – designate time during a meeting for staff to reflect and share their feelings about the loss or change. I like to use an “Honor & Wish” Exercise that goes like this: Ask everyone to pull out two sheets of paper. On the first piece, ask them to write something they want to honor from the legacy of the organization, the program, the past year, etc. that will now be changing. On the second piece, ask them to write a wish for the future of the organization, the program, the team, etc. as it ventures forward. Ask them to fold or ball up each piece of paper and hold one in each hand – then give them 30-45 seconds of silence to close their eyes, reflect on what they’ve written, and fully own and embody the honoring and wishing they are doing. If it’s appropriate in the environment, you can go around the group and ask each person to share.
Practices or rituals like these can help provide an appropriate and safe space for appreciating our collective legacy while embracing our collective future. They’re also vital to developing an organization culture that is adaptive, resilient, and ready to embrace and activate new strategic approaches. By honoring losses, we create space to learn, change, and grow.